Togooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Got a visitor from Togo recently, adding to my near-complete conquest of Africa. Had to look up where Togo is, truthfully. Officially the Togolese Republic, Togo is located in West Africa, with Ghana to the west, Benin to the east, and Burkina Faso to the north. Don't even get me started on Burkina Faso. The capital there is Ouagadougou, and for some reason I found this out when I was still in newspapers and wrote an entire humor column on the topic. In any event, with those neighbors, the country extends south to the Gulf of Guinea. The country covers only about 22,000 square miles, making i one of the smallest countries in Africa. It has a population of nearly 8 million, and is only about 71 miles wide.

The capital is Lome, located on the coast with the Gulf of Guinea. The economy is primarily agricultural, and the official language is French, although God only knows how many tribal languages are spoken there. Wikipedia and I do not. Togo used to be a German colony, but the French took over after World War I because that's the way the world works. A Togolese kayaker won a bronze medal at the 2008 Summer Olympics, the first person from his country to win an Olympic medal.

I tried to find some nice pictures of Togo, because I do that kind of thing for new visitors, but pretty much every picture that came up on Google had something to do with a movie called "Togo" that was about the dog that saved Nome, Alaska, from diptheria in the early 1900s that most people thought a dog named Balto did because of an animated movie called "Balto." Life is so complicated. I did find this, though:

Looks good to me. So, welcome to the Eff You family, Togo. Come back soon, and bring your friends.

My first first-time visitor from a place I've never heard of

Traffic has been kind of interesting lately. Sure, typical summertime doldrums, although visits have been at acceptable levels. And we've had the usual pr0n-seekers from places like Russia and Turkey who have challenged for the daily visitor-count lead (always failing to pass the U.S., at least so far). But we've also had a number of visitors who made me check to see if anyone from their country had ever come by -- folks from Kenya, Israel, Venezuela, Pakistan, Singapore and other less-commonly represented nations. In fact, I think Kenya might be the only nation in Africa besides South Africa and Madagascar to come by. I'd have to check, and that sounds like a lot of work, so I probably won't.

But today we have a genuine oddity. Sure, I've had visitors from nations that don't exist, like Palestine, and from nations that actually aren't nations, like Reunion -- which is an island in the Indian Ocean that is a French possession, or "overseas department" -- but I have never had a visitor from a country I've never heard of.

Until now. And I didn't get one visitor -- I got 4. So let's extend a big Eff You welcome to Saint Pierre and Miquelon. Yeah, that's what I said. Who, what and where the fuck is Saint Pierre and Miquelon? If I had to guess, I'd say somewhere in the Caribbean.

And I'd be wrong. Saint Pierre and Miquelon is another French possession that Wikipedia describes as:

a self-governing territorial overseas collectivity of France, situated in the northwestern Atlantic Ocean near Canada.[3] It is the only remnant of the former colonial empire of New France that remains under French control,[3] with a population of 6,080 at the January 2011 census.[1]
The islands are situated at the entrance of Fortune Bay, which extends into the southern coast of Newfoundland, near the Grand Banks.[4] They are 3,819 kilometres (2,373 mi) from Brest, the nearest point in Metropolitan France,[5] but just 25 kilometres (16 mi) off the Burin Peninsula of Newfoundland, Canada.

OK, then. Apparently, the weather is brutal, and the economy, based largely on fishing, is shitty :

The inhabitants have traditionally earned their livelihood by fishing and by servicing fishing fleets operating off the coast of Newfoundland.[3] The climate and the small amount of available land hardly favour activity such as farming and livestock (weather conditions are severe, which confines the growing season to a few weeks, and the soil contains significant peat and clay and is largely infertile).[39] Since 1992, the economy has been in steep decline, following the depletion of fish stocks, the limitation of fishing areas and the ban imposed on all cod fishing by the Canadian Government.[40]

The rise in unemployment has been curtailed by the state financial aid for the retraining of businesses and individuals. The construction of the second airport runway has also helped sustain the activity in the construction industry and public works.[24] Fish farming, crab fishing and agriculture are being developed to diversify the local economy.[3] The future of Saint Pierre and Miquelon rests on tourism, fisheries and aquaculture. Explorations are underway to exploit deposits of oil and gas.[24] Tourism relies on the proximity to Canada, while commerce and crafts make up the bulk of the business sector.

Sounds like a tough place to live. So tough that four if the residents there apparently are considering becoming contract attorneys. Or maybe they're looking for pr0n. Maybe they just like kit-tays. In any event, please welcome St. Pierre and Miquelon to Eff You Nation. Y'all come back soon!

Glad the neighborhood wasn't too jacked up for Lebanon to pay its first visit to Eff You

If you were thinking that things are a little too hectic in the Middle East these days for someone in Lebanon to drop by Eff You, then you would be wrong. Civil war in Syria on one side, Israel duking it out with Hamas on the other side. Sounds bad, right? Well, when the going gets tough, the tough go to Eff You for a quick visit. Got our first visitor from Lebanon yesterday.

Lebanon is a major Middle East crossroads and for many years benefitted from that. It was a part of the Ottoman Empire for about 600 years, becoming a French mandate after World War I. The country gained independence in 1943, and for a long time, things were good:

Before the Lebanese Civil War (1975–1990), the country experienced a period of relative calm and renowned prosperity, driven by tourism, agriculture, commerce, and banking.[10] Because of its financial power and diversity, Lebanon was known in its heyday as "the Switzerland of the East".[11] It attracted so many tourists that the capital, Beirut, was referred to as "the Paris of the Middle East".[12] At the end of the war, there were extensive efforts to revive the economy and rebuild national infrastructure.[13]

That civil war sucked, and Lebanon has had trouble ever since. Despite periods of stability, Lebanon keeps getting torn by warfare, frequently involving outside forces.

Anyway, by all accounts it is a beautiful country and, because someone in Lebanon came to Eff You, the Wolves family is now obligated to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Lebanon in times of trouble, so don't mess with my peeps. Lebanon, welcome to Eff You Nation.  Come again soon.

Slovenia comes knockin', whattaya gonna do?

Why, you open the door and say, "Welcome to Eff You Nation!" That's right, Slovenia came by for the first time today. It's getting hard to get first-time visitors here -- the only places left are mostly in Africa and the Pacific (by which I mean the tiny island nations out there in the middle of nowhere). I assume there are problems with electricity and internet access in many of those countries. But hey, we keep trying.

So, Slovenia. Slovenia is located in east central Europe, with a small coastline on the Adriatic Sea, and bordering Italy to the west, Austria to the north, Croatia to the south and southeast and Hungary to the northeast. Before independence in 1991, it was part of Yugoslavia. The population of slightly more than  2 million is majority Slovene, but contains significant ethnic Hungarian and Italian minorities, which use those languages even though Slovene is the only official language.

It seems right pretty:

Anyway, a big Eff You welcome to our visitor from Slovenia.

I just got a visitor from a country that doesn't exist

So the other day I got a visitor from "Palestine." What country is this, I thought. So I started doing some research. Oddly enough, Wikipedia (and I am not suggesting Wikipedia is always right, because I would be laughing too hard to type that) apparently does not consider "Palestine" to be a country, describing it as "a geographic region in Western Asia between the Mediterranean Sea and the Jordan River. It is sometimes considered to include adjoining territories."

Oddly enough, Palestine could have been a country right after World War II:

The United Nations Partition Plan for Palestine was a proposal developed by the United Nations, which recommended a partition with Economic Union of Mandatory Palestine to follow the termination of the British Mandate. On 29 November 1947, the U.N. General Assembly adopted a resolution recommending the adoption and implementation of the Plan as Resolution 181(II).[2]
The resolution recommended the creation of independent Arab and Jewish States and the Special International Regime for the City of Jerusalem. The Partition Plan, a four-part document attached to the resolution, provided for the termination of the Mandate, the progressive withdrawal of British armed forces and the delineation of boundaries between the two States and Jerusalem. Part I of the Plan stipulated that the Mandate would be terminated as soon as possible and the United Kingdom would withdraw no later than 1 August 1948. The new states would come into existence two months after the withdrawal, but no later than 1 October 1948. The Plan sought to address the conflicting objectives and claims of two competing movements: Arab nationalism in Palestine and Jewish nationalism, known as Zionism.[3][4] The Plan also called for Economic Union between the proposed states, and for the protection of religious and minority rights.
The Plan was accepted by the Jewish public, except for its fringes, and by the Jewish Agency despite its perceived limitations.[5][6] With a few exceptions, the Arab leaders and governments rejected the plan of partition in the resolution[7] and indicated an unwillingness to accept any form of territorial division.

So anyway, there you have it. Not a country, but could have been a country, except Arabs all wanted the Jews dead and wouldn't accept a Jewish state. Why Google classifies them as a country is beyond me, but, hey, welcome to Eff You Nation. Which also is not actually a country.

All Lithuania, all the time

Damn, y'all, third new visitor in four days. Lithuania dropped by, and we're happy to have them. The largest of the Baltic states -- with the others being Estonia and Latvia -- Lithuania has a storied and prominent place in Europe's history:

For centuries, the southeastern shore of the Baltic Sea was inhabited by various Baltic tribes. In the 1230s, the Lithuanian lands were united by Mindaugas, the King of Lithuania, and the first unified Lithuanian state, the Kingdom of Lithuania, was created on 6 July 1253. During the 14th century, the Grand Duchy of Lithuania was the largest country in Europe; present-day Lithuania, Belarus, Ukraine, and parts of Poland and Russia were the territories of the Grand Duchy. With the Lublin Union of 1569, Lithuania and Poland formed a voluntary two-state union, the Polish–Lithuanian Commonwealth. The Commonwealth lasted more than two centuries, until neighboring countries systematically dismantled it from 1772–95, with the Russian Empire annexing most of Lithuania's territory.

Having fucked by Russia in the past, Lithuania got fucked by Russia again in 1940, when the Bolshevik bastards reoccupied Lithuania, then promptly lost it to the Germans in World War II. Russia moved back in in 1944, and the Lithuanians loved it so much, they were the first Soviet satellite state to tell the USSR to fuck off.

Couple that with a solid national basketball team and it's hard not to like Lithuania. Welcome to the Eff You family. Don't let those Russky bastards mess with you.

Sri Lanka -- it's not just for breakfast any more!

That's right, people, Sri Lanka came by! Officially the Democratic Socialist Republic of Sri Lanka, Sri Lanka is an island nation off the southern tip of India that was called Ceylon until 1972. Usually, the quickest way to determine whether a country is democratic is to see if they put the word in the name of the country. If they do, it isn't. That doesn't seem to be the case with Sri Lanka, which is a multi-party democracy with two main parties, one leftist, one conservative. Anyway, about 20 million people live there, about 70 percent of them Buddhist.

Sri Lanka's main claim to fame for a good long while was its long-running rebellion/civil war, with the Tamil Tigers actually controlling a pretty good chunk of the country. The national military finally ended the 30-year rebellion in 2009 by launching a major military push and just whooping up on the Tamil rebels. Not clear why they didn't do that earlier.

For a long time, the civil war limited the appeal of Sri Lanka as a tourist destination. Let's face it, even gorgeous tropical islands are less attractive with a war going on. Since the end of the rebellion, though, Sri Lanka is growing its tourist trade quickly.

So, Sri Lanka, welcome to the Eff You family. Keep coming by, and bring your friends.

I got Slovakia, and you can't stop it

Slovakia, the Slovak Republic, Slovenská republika, however you want to cut it, spell it or pronounce it, I got me some Slovakia. Their neighbors and former countrymen, the Czech Republic (remember Czechoslovakia?) have been coming by Eff You for a while, but this is the first time for our Slovak friends, so we offer a big Eff You welcome to the Slovak Republic!

The Slovak Republic is a landlocked nation right next to the Czech Republic, Austria, Poland, Ukraine and Hungary. I supposed they could throw a rock at Germany if the Czechs ducked. Something just under 50,000 square kilometers, the nation's largest city is the capital, Bratislava. About 5 million people live in Slovakia, which is a member of the European Union, NATO and other even more worthless international organizations, like the UN. They speak Slovak, a member of the Slavic language family (think Russian for similarity). They spent a long time as part of Hungary and the Austro-Hungarian Empire.

Sounds like lots of historic places there, so Eff You followers planning a trip to Europe should drop by. Support our readers and enjoy their culture and heritage. Welcom, Slovak Republic! Sorry about that whole landlocked thing.

Pakistan comes by

Our newest first-time visitor comes to us from Pakistan. The Islamic Republic of Pakistan is  the sixth-most populous nation in the world with 180 million people, and the 36-largest in terms of land area.  Wikipedia has an interesting take on Pakistan:

Pakistan's post-independence history has been characterised by periods of military rule, political instability and conflicts with neighbouring India. The country continues to face challenging problems, including overpopulation, terrorism, poverty, illiteracy and corruption but regardless of that it ranks among the countries with most income equality[14] while has among the worlds most happiest citizens.[15] It also ranks among worlds most powerful countries. It is a member of the United Nations, the Commonwealth of Nations, the Next Eleven Economies, SAARC, ECO, UfC,D8, Cairns Group, Kyoto Protocol, ICCPR, RCD, UNCHR, Group of Eleven, CPFTA, Group of 24, the G20 developing nations, ECOSOC, founding member of the Organization of the Islamic Conference (now the Organisation of Islamic Cooperation), and CERN.[16] It is also characterized as a Major non-NATO ally byUnited States.

"Income equality"? I guess that's one way to describe pretty much everybody being mired in abject poverty. As for being among the world's "most powerful countries," that's true, but not because Pakistan belongs to a bunch of inernational organizations. Being a nuclear power with at least several dozen warheads and ballistic delivery systems (missiles, kids) might have a little something to do with it.

The Wikipedia main page article on Pakistan also ignores the very existence of the Directorate of InterServices Intelligence, Pakistan's intelligence agency. The ISI has a history of of supporting terrorism, training and support for the Taliban, harboring Osama Bin Laden and sponsoring terrorist activities overseas, notably in India. The ISI was heavily involved in planning the November 2008 terrorist attack on the Taj Hotel in Mumbai, India that left more than 160 people dead.

Normally I try to find nice things to say about first-time visitor nations. But this isn't a travel blog -- except when I say it is -- and Pakistan is no friend of the U.S. I'm sure there are a lot of good people in Pakistan, but there were also a lot of them dancing in the streets after the 9/11 attacks. So a big Eff You welcome to our visitor from Pakistan, unless the visitor was one of the people dancing in the streets after 9/11, in which case it's just a big Eff You.

Peru checks in

So, we got our first visitor from Peru the other day. Guess I'm still doing better in South America that Barry is. Peru, of course, is on the west coast of South America, bordered by Ecuador and Colombia to the north, Brazil to the east, Bolivia to the southeast, and Chile to the south. To the west, of course, is the Pacific Ocean.

Peru has been there awhile, civilization-wise, beginning with the Norte Chico civilization, apparently one of the oldest in the Americas. Of course, the Incas were there when Columbus got to the New World, the largest pre-Columbian civilization. Not that it helped them much. Francisco Pizarro still kicked their asses in 1532.

Lima is the capital. Peru's economy is pretty healthy and lives on exports. The country is pretty mountainous, what with the Andes being there and all. All those old civilizations make for some nifty ruins for tourists to spend money to see, like Macchu Picchu:

So, everybody give a big Eff You welcome to Peru. Thanks for stopping by!

Almost like a visit from the Kardashians -- Armenia checks in

We just got our first Eff You visitor from Armenia, homeland of Kim Kardashian's ancestors. Not exactly the same as the Kardashians dropping by, but a perfectly good excuse to run a photo of America's best-known Armenian-American:

Hey, I could have been much more exploitative -- there must be a bazillion pictures of her out there with next to nothing on. And I won't even mention the video that made her famous. But I digress.

So, Armenia. It's a democratic republic jammed in there between Turkey, Iran, Georgia, Azerbaijan and a couple countries you never heard of. Yeah, it's land-locked. And reallly mountainous. Mount Ararat, the traditional landing spot for Noah's Ark, is in Armenia.

Armenia is often referred to as the "first Christian nation" because it adopted Christianity as its official religion around 300 A.D. Things have been pretty much downhill from there. Armenia is most famous in this country for the Armenian genocide from 1915 to 1917, when the Turks killed as many as a million Armenians (the current population of Armenia is 3 million. Even tossing in the current 8 million or so Armenians living abroad, and that is nearly 1 in 10 Armenians. And, of course there were fewer Armenians then.) Turkey still says it didn't do shit. No one believes them. They also claim they didn't torture Lawrence of Arabia. Nobody buying that shit, either.

Anyway, Armenia has had a hard time of it, what with the genocide, its time as a Soviet possession, and the centuries of getting kicked around and owned by more powerful neighbors. We hope our Armenia visitor enjoys the blog. Send friends.

I'm feeling eastern Mediterranean

Not sure if the visitor came from the Greek side or the Turkish side, but we have our first Eff You visitor from Cyprus. Cyprus is in a strategic location in the Eastern Med, which means damn near everybody of consequence has occupied it over the ages, starting with Alexander the Great. The Brits took control in the late 19th century and granted independence in 1960. Turkey invaded in 1974 and took over about half the island. While the Republic of Cyprus government in theory rules all the island, the Turkish part is controlled by Turkey.

Cyprus is up to its butt in copper and is a great place from which to spy on the rest of the Middle East. Cyprus used to be a big banking center for folks who prize secrecy, but the financial collapse in 2012 kind of scotched that. Cyprus is close to an economic basket case these days.

Regardless, welcome to Eff You, Cyprus

Algeria in the house

We have our first visitor from Algeria. Welcome. Officially the People's Democratic Republic of Algeria, Algeria is really big -- the 10th largest country in the world. The capital is Algiers. Algeria used to be a French colony, and it fought a long war of independence against France. Not sure Algeria has enough to put together a Greatest Hits album. But hey, welcome, Algeria, and here's to better days!

A visitor from Bosnia and Herzegovina -- is that two for one?

Got another new visitor -- Bosnia and Herzegovina, sometimes called Bosnia-Herzegovina, sometimes just Bosnia. I guess the "and" thing is kind of like "Turks and Caicos." Not sure why they do it, if they used to be separate countries or what. Never been to either one -- or, any of the four, depending on what the "and" means. Anyway, Wikipedia  tells us that it is abbreviated BiH, so I don't have to type out all that stuff every time I refer to BiH.

Wikipedia also tells us that BiH used to be part of the Ottoman Empire, used to be part of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, and used to be part of Yugoslavia, both the Kingdom of Yugoslavia before World War II and the Socialist Federative Republic of Yugoslavia after World War II. When communism started collapsing in Eastern Europe in 1989, Yugoslavia also broke up and BiH voted for independence, leading to the Bosnian war with Serbia. Shit got ugly, lots of folks got killed, and eventually BiH emerged as independent.

The capital is Sarajevo, site of the 1984 Winter Olympics. Population is about 3.7 million, with about 500,000 inthe Sarajevo metro area. The nation is bordered by Croatia to the north, west and south, Serbia to the east and Montenegro to the southeast. The country has a 12-mile coastline on the Adriatic Sea centered on the city of Neum. I hear it's nice. Apparently the country is a nice place to visit. See?

Pretty.

Because this is not a geography blog, except when I say it is, I won't go into further detail. Nonetheless, Welcome and Eff You, Bosnia and Herzegovina.

Finally, the Scandinavian trifecta is complete!

From the early days of this blog, Sweden has been in the top three nations providing visitors to Eff You. Not sure why, but it's true. For a long time, Sweden was No. 2 before being bumped by Russia. I think the Russians like my use of the words "porn" and "fuck." They probably are disappointed in the amount of game food they've been subjected to, but that is their problem, not mine.

A few months ago, we finally got a Norwegian to drop by Eff You. The only one so far, as near as I can tell, but beggars can't be choosers. I am proud of my Norwegian visitor.

And now, at last, the last of the Big Three Scandinavian countries has checked in: people, Eff You has attracted somebody from Finland. Finland used to be part of Sweden, then part of Russia. I think they like the Swedes now more than they like the Russians.

The Republic of Finland shares land borders with Norway, Sweden and Russia, while Estonia lies to the south across the Gulf of Finland. The population of Finland in 2012 was about 5.4 million, with more than 1 million living in and around the capital of Helsinki. The eighth-largest nation in Europe in area, Finland is the most sparsely populated country in the European Union.

Finland has the distinction of having fought against both sides during World War II, and were technically at war with both sides simultaneously in 1944-45. The Finns fought The Winter War against the Soviets in 1939-40 and were forced to cede territory to the USSR at the end of that dust-up, then again in The Continuation War of 1941-1944. That time, the Finns kicked ass early, gained back what they had lost, then lost a lot of it again before halting the Soviets again. There was a ceasefire in 1944, but no treaty ending the war until 1947, which means that when the Finns fought The Lapland War against their former allies, the Germans, in 1944-45, they were technically at war with both sides. Neat trick.

Anyway, welcome Finland to the Eff You family. Come back soon, and bring your friends.

I've got Turkey, and it isn't even Thanksgiving!

Not talking about the bird, people, Eff You just got its first visitor from Turkey. We've discussed Turkey before at this blog, in particular here and here. Not much on Turkey lately, as it would appear the freedom movement currently as a jackboot on its throat. Or it could be that everything in Turkey is now hunky-fucking-dory, and there no longer is any need for protests. What do I know.

Well, I do know that somebody from Turkey came by, so I need to welcome them to Eff You nation. So, welcome to Eff You, and keep coming back. Not doing more background on Turkey right now because this isn't a geography blog (except when it is).

Finally, a good vacation destination visits Eff You

Martinique, bitches!

According to Wikipedia, the infallible source of all knowledge (take it with a grain of salt), Martinique "is an island in the Lesser Antilles in the eastern Caribbean Sea, with a land area of 1,128 square kilometres (436 sq mi) and a population of 386,486 inhabitants (as of Jan. 2013).[1] Like Guadeloupe, it is an overseas region of France, consisting of a single overseas department. One of the Windward Islands, it is directly north of St. Lucia, northwest of Barbados, and south of Dominica."

The official language of Martinique is French, but a lot of folks there also speak Antillean Creole. And, of course, Martinique was where the film adaptation of Ernest Hemingway's "To Have and Have Not," starring Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall, was set.

So, Martinique, welcome to the Eff You family. Bring your friends next time, and I look forward to visiting your island in the future.

Damn if we don't have some Poland

Got our first visitor from Poland a little bit ago. Poland, while famous mostly for getting curb-stomped by the Germans in 1939, is, of course, the birthplace of the late Pope John Paul II. Poland, as I'm sure the erudite readers of Eff You are aware, is bordered east and west by Ukraine and Germany, with a couple small countries like Lithuania, Belarus, and the Czech Republic scattered around it as well. The Kingdom of Poland was founded in 1065, and the current Republic of Poland was formed in 1989 in 1989 when the Poles told the Soviet Union to fuck off. In between, Poland was batted around by various European powers and generally had a hard time of it. The great astronomer, Nicolaus Copernicus, was a Pole.

Interestingly, Poland retains much of the wildlife that the rest of Europe killed off centuries ago:

Many animals that have since died out in other parts of Europe still survive in Poland, such as the wisent in the ancient woodland of the Białowieża Forest and in Podlaskie. Other such species include the brown bear in Białowieża, in the Tatras, and in the Beskids, the gray wolf and the Eurasian Lynx in various forests, the moose in northern Poland, and the beaver in Masuria, Pomerania, and Podlaskie.
In the forests, one also encounters game animals, such as red deer, roe deer and wild boars. In eastern Poland there are a number of ancient woodlands, like Białowieża forest, that have never been cleared by people. There are also large forested areas in the mountains, Masuria, Pomerania,Lubusz Land and Lower Silesia.
Poland is the most important breeding ground for European migratory birds. Out of all of the migratory birds who come to Europe for the summer, one quarter breed in Poland, particularly in the lake districts and the wetlands along the Biebrza, the Narew, and the Warta, which are part of nature reserves or national parks.

For those who don't know, this is a wisent:

Looks a hell of a lot like an American bison, doesn't it?

There's lots more interesting stuff about Poland, but this isn't a foreign cultures blog, except when it is. Anyway, visitor from Poland, welcome to the Eff You family, and bring your friends next time.

EffYou nation, please welcome South Africa

We have a visitor from South Africa, which means, of course, that I have to give you a little education on South Africa. From Wikipedia, we learn this:

South Africa, officially the Republic of South Africa, is a country located at the southern tip of Africa. It has 2,798 kilometres (1,739 mi) of coastline that stretches along the South Atlantic and Indian oceans.[7][8][9] To the north lie the neighbouring countries of Namibia, Botswana and Zimbabwe; to the east are Mozambique and Swaziland; and within it lies Lesotho, an enclave surrounded by South African territory.[10] South Africa is the 25th-largest country in the world by land area, and with close to 53 million people, is the world's 24th-most populous nation.

One of the oddities about South Africa is the lack of a genuine capital city, apparently:

South Africa has no legally defined capital city. The fourth chapter of the Constitution of South Africa, states that "The seat of Parliament is Cape Town, but an Act of Parliament enacted in accordance with section 76(1) and (5) may determine that the seat of Parliament is elsewhere."[75] The country's three branches of government are split over different cities. Cape Town, as the seat of Parliament, is the legislative capital; Pretoria, as the seat of the President and Cabinet, is the administrative capital; and Bloemfontein, as the seat of the Supreme Court of Appeal, is the judicial capital, while the Constitutional Court of South Africa sits in Johannesburg. Most foreign embassies are located in Pretoria.

South Africa by all accounts is a beautiful country. It is one of the places I hope to visit one day. In the meantime, welcome, and to our South African visitors (there actually were two) we send forth a hearty EffYou.

Got Singapore if you want it

That's right, the first visitor from Singapore to Eff You came by today. Singapore is a former British colony consisting of more than 60 islands at the tip of the Malay Peninsula. It gained independence from Great Britain in 1963 and was briefly part of Malaysia, becoming independent as the Republic of Singapore in 1965. A little over 5 million people live in the republic, which has become a major economic power in Asia with its remarkably free, market-based economy.

Singapore is a pretty straight-laced place, I can testify from personal experience. In the early 1980s, when Lee Kwan Yew was still prime minister, Singapore offered long-haired male visitors a choice: a visit to the state barber, conveniently located in the airport, or passage out on the next flight to whereever the damned hippy freak came from, long hair intact. Everybody I knew took the haircut, which was quite short. Singapore also famously banned chewing gum in public, to keep people from trashing the streets and sidewalks with discarded chewed gum.

So, welcome to Eff You Nation, Singapore. Glad to have you, and tell all your friends.