What can I do besides talk about hot naked women to drive traffic?

Really, I'm just asking here. Of course, if traffic spikes, I guess I'll have my answer. And then you can look forward to lots of talk about hot naked women. Could look like this:

Or this:

Technically, neither one of those women is naked. But on the other hand, I'm just playin' here, so I'm not sure it matters. On the other hand, hot chicks standing next to volcanoes isn't too bad, is it? OK, so I have female readers, too. I guess I've gone totally sexist here. Fine, in the future, no hot naked women. Unless, of course, this post drives traffic through the roof. I'm just sayin'.