Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Bambi is going DOWN

The federal government has plans to kill a metric shit ton of deer in the next couple months on a pair of War Between the States battlefields in Maryland that apparently have deer populations that need thinning. One of the battlefields is about 30 miles away from me, and one is less than 10 miles. This could get exciting:
HAGERSTOWN, Md. – Federal government sharpshooters will target hundreds of white-tailed deer at two Civil War battlefields in Maryland this December, launching a multi-year program aimed at curbing damage to forests and plants, the National Park Service said Tuesday.
The Agriculture Department sharpshooters plan to kill 243 deer at Antietam National Battlefield and 278 at Monocacy National Battlefield from December through March under a program the park service approved in 2014. Both parks have deer population densities more than 10 times greater than the commonly accepted sustainable density of 15 to 20 per square mile, park service spokeswoman Jenny Anzelmo-Sarles said.
The government will donate all suitable deer meat to food banks, she said.
We do have an ass of deer around here, and the relatively mild winter this year didn't help. Still, I wish that the Agriculture Department would set up comfy seating and sell popcorn so we could watch them get medieval on Bambi. That would be a great way to spend days that have no football games.

I do have one question, though. Why the fuck does the Agriculture Department have sharpshooters?

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