The dude is probably 100 years old, and so has nothing left to be ashamed of, I guess. He's about 5'10'', 45 or 50 pounds. OK, he's really probably about 140, and not a day over 60, but he is a skinny, old motherfucker who cannot seem to get the top of his pants and the bottom of his tee-shirt to meet. No shit, there was a four-inch strip of flesh between his shirt and pants, and it wasn't because his shirt was too short. His pants were at a level that did not border on vulgar -- they had reached the level of oh-fuck-I'm-going-to-puke-I-can't-fucking-believe-this-shit. The woman sitting next to me used the phrase "pubic hair" five times in describing this guy to me after she saw him in the kitchen. She was so appalled, I figured she was exaggerating.
A while later, I saw the dude in the hallway. She wasn't. Thank God I only saw him from behind, from a distance. Even that view was bad enough.I hadn't given him the nickname yet. I guess maybe I was too much in shock. He got the nickname here, And earned it:
At least he's trying, though, which is more than can be said of the guy I like to call Hunter S. Thompson, who always looks like he is coming off a bender, starting a bender or maybe is in the middle of a bender. Anyway, he is tall, gangly, gray curly hair and likes to wear shorts, the dress code notwithstanding. Unlike Santa Claus, Hunter is not even trying to dress well. You look at him and think "Venice Beach homeless dude." You can easily see him sleeping in a lifeguard stand by night and by day charging people to look after their car when they park in "his" parking space. Not happening in DC, I guess, but that's the look he's cultivating. Or maybe he just moved here from Venice Beach.Why do I mention this? Yesterday, I saw the dude working at the agency where, until this afternoon, I was working. His pants and shirt now meet, but he still looks like he just came off a five-day drunk in West Hollywood (and that's not good). I am certain that he can be found in Adams Morgan, charging people five bucks to stop standing in the parking space they would like to use so that they can go to a froo-fro restaurant, and then charging them another five bucks so "no one else" will vandalize theiir car. Probably makes more doing that than temping.