I've mentioned The Bridge Troll previously. I think I'm on a project with his older brother, The Garden Gnome. While the Troll was merely lazy and incompetent, the Garden Gnome is something a bit more.
Major parenthetical here: Did I mention I don't usually bother to learn people's names? Yeah, projects are transitory, people come and people go and, frankly, I don't have the energy to remember who these people are. I'll see them again, in all likelihood, and I'll just avoid calling them by name, even when they know mine.
This can get embarrassing, of course. I can think of several people I've known -- or at least worked with on repeated projects -- for as much as five years, and I either still don't know their names or I only recently learned them. I confess to learning some people's names, but for the most part, I don't bother. They'll be gone again soon anyway.
Which brings us to The Garden Gnome. Presumably, he has a real name, but if you put a pointy hat and a vest on him, everyone would say, "Huh. A garden gnome." Little bitty dude, he's older than me (which means older than dirt) but nowhere near as good looking.
And probably 20 times as lecherous. For several days now, he's been hitting on a woman on the project who is very nice, quite good looking and probably young enough to be his granddaughter. She's too nice to kick him in the nuts, which explains why he persists. I think that's the only thing that would stop him. For her sake, I hope this project ends soon. Or she kicks him in the nuts.
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