That's right, kids, it's International Talk Like A Pirate Day, so you know what to do. Aaarrgh, mateys, shiver me timbers with those horrible clichés.
Where did the pirate go for vacation? Aaaaaarrrrrgh-gentina.
Why does the pirate walk so slow in the morning? Aaaaaarrrrgh-thritis.
Why did the pirate go to sea? They wouldn't take him in the Aaaaaarrrrgh-my.
Thank you, I'll be here all week. Be sure to tip your bartenders and waitresses. And try the veal.