What would you do with a hammer?

So I'm sitting there, minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts to sing: "If I had a hammer ..."

I immediately cut him off: "If you had a hammer, I would take if from you and beat you do death with it."

Singing on the job? I'm sorry, but there are some things up with which we will not put. Apologies to Winston Churchill, but there will be no sentences ended with a preposition here.

Which reminds me. My mother, the English (and drama) teacher used to love the joke about the English teacher who takes her car in to repair a problem. She asks if the mechanic can figure out what the problem is and fix it:

"Well, first I'll have to see where my tools are at," says the mechanic.

"Never end a sentence with a preposition," says the English teacher.

"First I'll have to see where my tools are at, asshole," says the mechanic.

Love it.